Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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