I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
