bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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