My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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