its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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