it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
