what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
