i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Randomize
