i just had sex bonerless
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
