Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
