I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
