That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
