we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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