bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
