PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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