Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
