the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
