WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
