going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
