Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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