Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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