The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
