You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
