**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
