So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
