Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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