I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Randomize
