Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
