In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
