yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
