just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
