I like my sex mixed with concussions.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize