the new term for farting is butt boxing.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
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