No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
