So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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