I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
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