Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I just had sex on a roof
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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