i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Randomize
