That's when you crack a 10am beer
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize