im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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