"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
