shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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