I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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