Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
