can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
