Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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