i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
