If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
