actually, I'm a sock model
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
