i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
